


Sunbeam

by CheyanneChika



Series: GO/MCU are totally in the same 'verse. [2]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: 13th Century CE, 1990s, Crack, Drunk Crowley (Good Omens), Gen, Norse Religion and Lore Inaccuracies, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Snake Friends Crowley (Good Omens) & Loki (Marvel), Snake Loki (Marvel), Teleportation, The Tesseract (Marvel)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-07 21:53:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20467172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheyanneChika/pseuds/CheyanneChika
Summary: Crowley borrowed Loki's schtick. Loki's not happy about this.  Fortunately, Crowley is drunk.  Snakiness ensues.





	Sunbeam

**Author's Note:**

> Apparently, this is gonna be a thing now.

Loki was generally unenthused when the humans on Midgard who had been worshipping him as the God of Mischief were suddenly worrying about another creature who can shapeshift into a snake and wreak havoc.

Most displeased.

He would find this interloper and kill him. Well, find, torture, maim and then kill. 

Priorities.

The being wasn’t hard to locate. He was in human form, male, getting drunk and sowing discord in a local tavern.

“And I’m just saying, you Viking lot, you rape and pillage and murder and take land and wha’sss it all for? You’re just gonna lose it anyway since there’s alwaysss someone bigger and badder and scarier.”

The big, bad, scary and very drunk “Vikings” in the tavern were all getting up and making their heavy-treaded way over to the slender red head with tinted spectacles and a loose grip on his mead.

Not today. Loki wanted this one for himself. Being beaten to death by human worms would be intriguing to watch but Loki wanted to make this one suffer for attempting to usurp his role. He teleported in, grabbed the imposter and vanished, yanking them both away.

…

Crowley felt a grip that wasn’t human. It was wrapped around his arm. And then the tavern was gone and he was traveling by wormhole?

He panicked and let go of the mead. It fell away and vanished into the ether. He was a snake before they landed and he collapsed into a heap on a stone floor. He snapped up his head, watching and tasting the air.

The humanoid before him was not an Earthling. He was robed in metal too finely shaped and linen too finely woven for human creation.

And there was the whole teleporting bit.

“Who are you?” he asked Crowley, tilting his head to the side slightly, to match them.

Silence. Tongue flick.

“I am Loki, son of Odin, God of Mischief. You will speak.”

More silence.

Loki glared. “I heard you speak, now do so. Answer me!”

Crowley rolled his eyes. (Snakes normally do not have quite that functionality, but Crowley is Crowley.)

Loki’s jaw clenched. He snapped his fingers at the snake. Nothing happened.

Another snap.

Another eyeroll.

“Fine!” Loki growled. He snapped a third time and then there were two snakes. He hissed. “_Now speak.”_

_“You’re putting a lot of effort into this,” _Crowley hissed back.

_“I like it here. These pathetic mortals will give anything to keep me from sowing chaos. I don’t like when other non-mortals get in my way. How are you blocking my spells?”_

_“Is that was that tingling was?”_

Loki’s next hiss had no particular meaning beyond an expression of rage.

_“Touchy.”_ Crowley wavered the top fifth of his body to express laughter. _“I’m a demon. Mortal magic has no effect on me.”_

_“I am no mortal!”_

_“You can be killed; I would know if you were Demon or Angel.”_

_“Are you saying you cannot be killed?”_

Crowley’s head swayed in an approximation of a shrug. _“This body could be destroyed, I suppose. But I would just come back with a fresh one.”_

_“Interesting.”_

_“And, just in case you’re planning to torture me, I’ll save myself the trouble and just pop back to Hell, fill out some paperwork, maybe get some turned in on time for once, and then I'll be back. You can’t be here all the time. So much chaos to cause, so little time.” _

Was it Loki’s imagination or did this snake know how to smirk? In spite of himself, he found his ire cooling. The rest of him was cooling as well. Snake form in this northern wasteland of snow and ice was not enjoyable.

_Shall we adjourn to our true forms?”_

Soon enough, the two were once more male and humanoid or Asgardian…whatever. Crowley brushed away imaginary dust. “It’ssss been fun,” he said.

“I wish I could say the same,” Loki replied.

Crowley’s still reptilian eyes flashed behind his spectacles that once more rested on his nose. “Be seeing you,” he said and vanished.

Loki reached out with senses far more enhanced than others of his kind but found no trace of magic to follow. He stomped around for a bit and then yelled for Heimdall. He was bored of Midgard anyway.

…

Crowley fell in love with the skylight in Aziaraphale’s bookshop within a month of its purchase. The skylight wasn't supposed to be there. The demon had just fallen through the roof while doing...things. Aziraphale had miracled a pane of glass there when he returned to find the sleeping serpent on his floor.

In the interest of keeping Crowley from misbehaving and doing demon-y things, the angel worked another miracle to hold the sunlight in place to cast a beam on a large cushioned platform and not move from sunrise to sunset.

Very often, he would find a serpent there. Sometimes even two. Aziraphale wasn’t sure to make of it but Crowley wasn’t in distress so he let it go. What he missed was the first bookshop encounter.

Crowley was waiting for Aziraphale to return with takeout and was halfway to pissed when Loki appeared. “You!” he snapped looming over the sprawled demon on a couch.

“Me?” Crowley asked, squinting. Something about this bloke was familiar.

“You…demon.”

“I have a name, you know,” Crowley grumbled. Had he missed a meeting and they’d sent someone new? He wasn’t sure. No wait, this guy was… “Norway! You’re that Loki chap. The one who turns into a snake!”

Loki blinked rapidly. He’d been forgotten? However briefly didn’t matter. He’d been _forgotten!_

Rage coiled in his gut.

Crowley missed it entirely. “Come come, you must try out this sunbeam, it’s lovely.” Without a second thought, he was a serpent and wound about himself on the cushion positioned in the sunlight.

“The Tesseract was here!” Loki snapped, trying to stay on target. This is why he was here. 

Crowley hissed a response and Loki glowered before also turning into a serpent as well. _“Repeat yourself.”_

Crowley huffed. _“I said, it’s gone now. It appeared and disappeared.”_

_“Does that happen often?”_

Crowley nodded. _“Come, enjoy the sunbeam for a bit. You can hunt for it later. It’s not here.”_

It was a rather lovely sunbeam. For a pathetic star like this one.

…

Aziraphale patted both serpents and was pleased that they scared the crap out of half of his potential customers.


End file.
